Men have it easier

MCLEAN, VA - JUNE 13: World Champion hockey star Alex Ovechkin shaves his 'playoff beard' with the Gillette Fusion ProShield Razor during an official Gillette Shave event on June 13, 2018 in Mclean, Virginia. (Photo by Larry French/Getty Images for Gillette)

Men have it easier

One of the great’ things about always knowing you were meant to be born in a male body but having to spend most of your life in a female one is that you get to experience a lot of things from both sides.

Early on into my transition, it was painfully obvious that men, if you missed the memo, have this life thing a lot easier than women.

One of the common responses from men when they learned of my transition was ‘good luck with shaving, it’s a real pain’ because that’s clearly all this transition involves – growing facial hair.

It might be a pain, but what is an *actual* pain is bleeding to death for five days every month coupled with massive oestrogen-induced migraines which make you want to saw your head off at the neck. Emotions, which have you crying because you accidentally killed a fly that, just a few moments ago you swore had been sent here by the devil himself to torment you, are the cherry on top. As for the cramps, imagine being kicked in the balls every five minutes for around 36 hours and you’re almost there.

No more of that thankfully.

Men have it easy.

So far, the only downside, and I use that word very lightly indeed, of the male hormones has been an ever-increasing libido. Testosterone is the nuts. It increases your confidence and body strength, chills you the fuck out and makes you think you are magnificent. I know that’s not just me. People who think it causes roid-rage have clearly met people who had anger issues to begin with. I’m so Zen, you’d probably want to punch me.

As for being treated like a guy instead of a woman? So I don’t get let on the bus first anymore. That’s a small price to pay for not fearing I might get raped instead.

Even the abuse I receive online is different. And I used to get a *lot* of abuse as anyone who follows my football account will know. I no longer receive gender-specific insults. A few guys have said ‘look at the state of you’ in regards to my looks, but that’s it. The insults are a lot less specific. I no longer get told I don’t know what I’m talking about simply because of the genitals I was born with and the way society decided to raise me. People also want me to go to the kitchen a lot less and their ironing seems to have ironed itself. Bonus and bonus.

I’m the same person, my views haven’t really changed. They just aren’t as easily ridiculed now because I’m more socially acceptable writing about football as a guy. It’s sad, but I’d always suspected that might happen and now I know.

If only they knew I was trans!

In fact, it says it right there in my Twitter bio, but most CIS people (that’s people who have a gender identity which matches the one the doctor assigned to them when they popped out of their mum’s womb) don’t even know what that means. They see it and either ignore it or think I ran out of characters and was trying to spell a longer word. Maybe they think I’m a transformer. Robot in disguise. Sort of. Not really. How cool would that be?

Men really do have it easier in so many ways.

But that’s not to say there isn’t lots for trans guys to learn nor that their journey is an easy one, far from it.

Here at the Trans Guy Handbook I hope to address all issues that impact on trans guys who are so often left out of the discourse.
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Belfast-based trans guy. Have words, will travel. If in doubt, assume sarcasm

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